Uncompromised

Recently, I had dinner with some girls from the international student bible study, my new friends this semester. Over dinner, we went around the table talking about our ideal guys, haha. Typical. And at the end, when they got to me, I said,

"Hopefully the guy is taller than me by several inches, given that I'm super short and that shouldn't be too difficult. But most important, whoever he be, he must love God more than he loves me. He should be hardworking. He can make me laugh. He has a heart for people and loves international students."

And we went into a long conversation about why Christians want to date/marry Christians, and how that was unfair in their eyes. We talked about these things we looked for in our 'partner' as if our lists were judgement on all the men of the world.  When I said that the male leaders in our international ministry probably look for Christian women in marriage, I could easily sense that this brought an unsettled atmosphere to our table. ...But how could religion not be a big deal? Religion can play into polygamy, into domestic abuse, into mutilation

reflecting just now.. it's not about what I care most about him, it's about what I care most about myself and about my life.

What I mean:

International students have become a source of life for me. If he doesn't love international students, there is a whole chunk of me that he would never know, never understand. So how could he even begin to love me entirely, when there is so much about me that he is unable to see?

I care most about God. God is my life. He is my everyday, my every moment. If he doesn't know God, know Jesus, that is my life that he would never know, never understand. So how could he even begin to love me, if this is all of me, and he is unable to see?

So, I continually want God. I continually choose God. I will never change my heart about that.

I say I look for those things in a 'partner' because I don't want those things in me and about me to ever go away. God is not a debate for my life. I will not compromise God.

Some might say they prefer someone who loves dancing, running, or singing, who lives in a certain part of the world, or makes a certain amount of wealth. It's looking at our own lives, thinking  "who am I and what about who-I-am do I care about the most"

DISCLAIMER: I do not support the idea of marriage as being a calling, or singleness as a calling. You don't have to be called by God to be single. It is not a disease. God wants us to be faithful in everyday. We are not incomplete until we are married. We are complete when we proclaim Jesus as lord over our lives, and when we say that, we're saying, 'nothing else but Jesus.'